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6: How To Win At Failure. The Real Reason We Keep Getting Stuck And How To Fix It, With Ressel Yu.

Linsi Brownson
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This episode brings magic and science to the table, as we dive into the topic of failure. Specifically, WHY we try so dang hard to avoid failure – and how it causes us to fail in a different (and more dangerous) way.

My guest is Ressel Yu, a quantum energy healer, which is super fun because we also chat about the invisible blocks that everyone has. We talk about where those blocks come from and how they impact our businesses…and best of all, how to get rid of them.

In this episode, you’ll hear…

  • Why inspirational quotes suck.

  • The two kinds of failure we face, and which one to worry about.

  • How ‘energy work’ works to accelerate your growth.

Episode Links:

Transcript

Linsi Brownson: Ressel Yu is a quantum healer, and her company is called The Abundance Center. Ressel, tell us who you work with and how you help them.

Ressel Yu: Thank you for having me. It’s so exciting to be here. I work with business owners, entrepreneurs, and companies. I help them through some of the struggles that they’re having – maybe it’s issues attracting more clients or increasing their revenue.

If they have goals that for whatever reason they’re just not hitting, it’s often because of certain energetic blocks I simply remove them, and off they go.

Linsi Brownson: People can accelerate very quickly just by taking some of those blocks out of the way. What’s really fascinating about what you do, and I do want to get into that more, but we talk a lot on this podcast about hurdles in business. Most of the time these things are very tangible, and if you see a roadblock coming up, or you have a specific challenge that you want to overcome, you can plan for it or find a solution for it.

What you do is the energetic side of that. You’re able to uncover those blocks that people don’t even necessarily know that they have. They just know that something isn’t working, and it’s really frustrating when they are doing everything they know how to do. I have been working with you, and the work that you do is amazing. It’s been really incredible in helping me shed some beliefs that I didn’t realize I had, and make some pretty exponential growth in my life.

Let’s talk about some of the more interesting blocks that you’ve seen and been able to uncover with people.

Ressel Yu: Oh gosh, where do I begin? The majority of them are about self sabotage. Also, worthiness. If our unconscious mind doesn’t feel that we deserve or are worthy of success or prosperity, or even joy, then our bodies begin to sabotage it.

I don’t know if you or your audience has ever experienced, like they know that they have to do something, but they create a drama or a situation where it stops them, or prevents them from doing what it is that they were supposed to do.

Like they’ll go into their office and rather than picking up the phone and making those sales calls or those follow up calls, they look around and they’re like, “You know what? I should really put up those curtains today.” Or, “Oh, you know what? Let me pay off all my bills first. Let me take care of the admin stuff before I get to making those sales calls.” But before you know it, eight hours passes by, you have not ever picked up that phone. I don’t know if anybody’s ever experienced that.

Linsi Brownson: [Laughing] No, I think you’re completely off base on that.

Ressel Yu: Haha, exactly. It really comes down to certain traumas they’ve experienced as a child. Maybe family, friends will say, “Do you really deserve that? Do you really think you can achieve that goal?”

And as a child we’re thinking, “Oh my gosh, maybe they’re right. Maybe I can’t. What am I thinking?” So we carry that into our adulthood and then we question, “Why is it I’m not as successful as so and so?” Right? Well it’s because of those traumas, those words that we heard as a child.

Linsi Brownson: Yeah, it’s so fascinating! The thing that I remember from the very first time that I talked with you, and one of the reasons that I wanted to work with you, was that I kept saying to myself, “I know that I’m doing all the right things.”

I know how to run a business. I know how to start a business and how to grow a business. Everything was laid out as it “should” be, but something was still just not clicking. I think that really speaks to the power of energy work. It’s not for lack of knowledge and it’s certainly not for lack of trying. So with energy work you’re really able to go in and unlock.

We always had this joke between the two of us about, “Oh, unworthy came up again.” So I clearly had issues of unworthiness. So we kept going deeper and deeper, and being able to shed those layers of unworthiness was really powerful for me.

But if you would have asked me on day one, “Do you think that you’re worthy?” My conscious mind says, “Absolutely. Of course. I’ve been doing this a long time. I know what I’m doing. I know that I help people.” And I hear this so often with my clients too, they really think that they have something figured out, but when it’s still not working and you’ve got this sense that it’s just not clicking for you, there’s a really good chance that there’s some energy stuff involved, right?

Ressel Yu: For sure. Exactly. You know, I teach a lot around the Law of Attraction. When I had started that several years ago, and I’m sure you’ve probably watched The Secret or read the book –

Linsi Brownson: Mm-hmm (affirmative).

Ressel Yu: It talks about how you can just “think yourself to success,” right? Think and Grow Rich. I can’t even remember who wrote that book.

Linsi Brownson: Napoleon Hill.

Ressel Yu: Think and Grow Rich. I’m like, “Oh my gosh, that’s all it takes? I just have to think and create positive thoughts and I’ll get it?” So I tried it and I failed miserably.

Linsi Brownson: Yes.

Ressel Yu: Okay, and so I’m thinking, “Gosh I must be horrible if I can’t do something as simple as think positive and then all abundance would come to me.” Well I realized it wasn’t the conscious thoughts that were thinking, it was our unconscious thoughts.

So like you were saying earlier, you knew what you had to do. You’ve done it before. But why didn’t it happen when you followed all the steps? It’s because your unconscious mind was not in alignment with what your conscious mind was thinking.

Linsi Brownson: Yeah, absolutely. It’s a straight up block. And I think that is one of the huge misconceptions in this concept of positive thinking. People really struggle with it, and they’re like, “How will positive thoughts get me what I want?” Well this is really the reason that they don’t, because you don’t have a positive thought and then your thought just stays positive and the negative thoughts go away. That’s not how these things work.

Tell me a bit about your journey. I’m really fascinated by the lessons that we’ve learned from this path that we’re on, and how we have gotten to where we are today. For most entrepreneurs, they have a particular lesson in mind, something that was either really hard or painful, or maybe even unexpected, that’s really shaped the way that you work today. I’d love to hear what that is for you.

Ressel Yu: Wonderful. Well I’ve never actually publicly shared this, so it’s really exciting to share it with you. The biggest lesson for me, coming from a very perfectionist background was accepting failure. I was so afraid of failing that I wouldn’t do anything unless I knew that it was going to succeed 100%. And so I noticed that I would stop myself, and never step outside of my comfort zone. But, really, outside of that comfort zone was my success, prosperity and abundance.

So, being able to accept that failure is not a problem, it’s just a lesson. Without the failures I would never be where I am today, because let me tell you if I have the opportunity to fail, it’s because I’m trying something new.

Linsi Brownson: Yes.

Ressel Yu: That was my biggest challenge because I wanted it to be perfect. I wanted that so badly that I would just stay perfect and not move. And so now I’ve learned to marinate in my failures and look for the learning. That was my greatest lesson.

Linsi Brownson: Yeah. And I love the word. I know some people don’t like to use Failure as a word because we have this bad connotation with it. But I love the word, because I do think that it is a very yin/yang, positive/negative, opposite side of success in how we understand it.

People are really afraid to fail because they’re afraid of how they think they’re going to feel if they fail. People associate negative feelings with failure. What’s just so fascinating about that is most of the time…I mean, maybe you can speak to this in your own story, but when you did have those failures, were the feelings as horrible as you imagined that they would be when you were trying to avoid them?

Ressel Yu: You know, they were bad, but the thing is I survived.

That was the biggest thing to realize. I can fail and yet I’m okay. Nothing bad really happened, except that emotion. Feeling those time and again it’s like, “You know what? It’s not even a big deal anymore because I know what that failure taught me. “

Linsi Brownson: So much of what I believe in, and the circles that I’m in, we’re really so interested in living a meaningful life. Living within your comfort zone cannot be meaningful because there just isn’t enough color to it. There’s not enough of the black and white, we need that contrast.

I think that a great way to look at things is to ask yourself “What are the ways that I can fail?” Because failing, as you said, is about doing something new. And something new gives you life. It gives you energy. It wakes you up to what’s possible.

Ressel Yu: All the way. Oh my God, I’m getting the chills as you’re speaking that. That is so true.

Linsi Brownson: Ressel, it’s been a pleasure. Thank you so much for coming and sharing with us.

Ressel Yu: Thank you!