69: The right way to grow your business.
Call it ambition, perfectionism, logical thinking....whatever you call it, the desire to know the fastest and best way to achieve things often makes them harder to achieve.
In this episode I'm sharing some hindsight wisdom that I use to help me keep moving forward even when I wonder "am I doing this right?"
Trying to figure out the right way is the slowest and most painful way to do it.
Key Takeaways:
Trying to figure out the right way to do some thing is the slowest way of doing some thing.
The right way only exists in hindsight (and only if you choose to label it as "right").
Your future self would rather have you be committed than right.
Ps, make sure you are subscribed to the show, and I’d love to hear what you think of this episode! Take a screenshot in your player and tag me @linsibrownson on Instagram.
Links
The book I mentioned (updated since the one I read): Get Clients Now! A 28-Day Marketing Program for Professionals, Consultants, and Coaches.
Sound editing is provided by Erik Hulslander at hearnoevilmedia.com
Transcript
You are listening to Be Brilliant in Your Business, the podcast for small business owners to be focused, energized and in charge as you build the business you love.
Hey, hey Mavericks. Today I want to talk about my obsession with being right.
Not in a know-it-all kind of way, though, I could have a whole other episode on just learning to shut up. But in this case, I'm talking about being right as in doing things “the right way.”
This little gem comes out in most of my personal development work.
And it's also a fun thing that I noticed whenever I Google. My history shows things like “best Thai restaurant in Austin.” “Best non toxic sunscreen for pale, freckled skin over 30.” “Best TV show to fill the never-ending void of Gilmore Girls.”
Because I don't want just any Pad Thai or cheeseball family drama. I want the right one. And yes, we can all laugh at my life choices. But this really does show up in nearly every area of my life.
And I wonder if it shows up for you too? Because the way we do one thing is the way we do most things. And it may not seem like a big deal in some areas. Maybe it isn't a big deal ;)
But when it comes to our business, trying to figure out the right way to do something, is the slowest way of doing something.
I'm now in a place in my business that I dreamed about being in for a while. Right now I'm living what used to be my future vision, which is super cool. And now, as I look backward at what it took to get here, I have some hindsight wisdom of knowing how I did it.
And because it wasn't very long ago, I can also remember what I was thinking about back then, compared to what I'm thinking about now. I can see what I was right about what I was wrong about. And most importantly, I can see what I would do differently.
And here's the truth: The way that I got here was the right way. It's the right way because I choose to believe that it's the right way. That every misstep, all the drama, all the luck, the whole shebang.
I choose to believe that it happened exactly how it was supposed to. But what I do it the same way again? Absolutely not. Because now, I can see really clearly how much time and energy I wasted trying to figure out the right way to get here.
Thinking that there was a right way slowed me way down. It made me unnecessarily confused and frustrated and tired.
So here's a specific example because I think that you can relate and I know a number of my clients have also struggled with this too.
If I were to Google “the best marketing method to get clients now.” I know that sounds so gross. I chose that phrase though, because one of my favorite sales books from back in the day is called Get Clients Now! It's by C.J. Hayden. The book is great. I totally recommend it.
But today, if we were to search this on Google, the results we would get would be have a Facebook page, have a Facebook group, join a Facebook group, be in other people's Facebook groups, go on Pinterest, have an Instagram, create an email funnel, run Facebook ads, write a book, join LinkedIn, join a networking group, right? Lots of options, lots of opinions about the right way to get clients right now.
So when I started as an entrepreneur, it was before social media was a thing. And the way to “get clients” was basically two ways - you could advertise or you could go to networking events. And I didn't have money to advertise. So networking, that was the deal. But I'm an introvert, and I'm also a deep relationship builder. So I really hate shallow, agenda driven conversations. with strangers. I hated networking events so much.
And even though there are a lot more groups these days for people who also don't like networking, it's just, there's no version of this that I really feel like I'm a part of these are just not my jam. So it's great news that I no longer have to do that to grow my business because they get to be online, except that I didn't even realize how attached I was to this idea that networking events was the right way to build a business. Even after establishing myself online, I still had this idea that social media was like “playing marketing” and that I was being irresponsible if I didn't drag myself to something that qualified as a networking event every week.
So like I would spend all this time and energy on social media, but none of that was ever enough. I was like “well, you still have to go and do that other thing, otherwise you're not doing it right.” So interesting. Every moment that I spent half-heartedly looking for events that I thought I could probably stomach. Every moment that I spent beating myself up about not doing this right, about not talking to enough people when I went to the event. About not hitting a weekly quota of going to enough events. It's just so cringe-worthy.
I could have been so much kinder to myself. I could have been spending that time and that energy, doing something that actually lit me up. Whether it's business related or not, I probably would have still come out ahead. And I don't say that out of regret, but my current self has just so much peace and so much clarity about all these details that I really used to fret because it's not just networking events.
I had the same drama, about being on Facebook, about having an email list, creating an online program. I just had so much judgment about there being a right way, and insisting that I must be doing it the wrong way. And so my current self, to my past self just keeps saying, “who cares?” My past self keeps showing up like, should I do this? Should I do that? Should I have this? But what about that? Bup, bup, bup, bup, bup bup.
And my current self is like “dude, just relax. Just do it how you want to do it.” Because that's the truth; However you want to do it is the right way.
I couldn't commit to doing it my way, the way I actually wanted to run my business, until I was willing to let go of there being a right way to run my business. And finally, when I did, I went from being hesitant to being committed. And I started seeing what was working and doing more of that. I kept celebrating everything that worked, and then I got more and more excited about it. At first it worked a little bit, and then it worked a little bit more. And then it snowballed. And here we are.
So I show myself this example now as I, of course, am fretting about the next right thing. This doesn't go away. I'm going to be thinking there's a right and wrong way to do this…probably forever. But it's okay. I'm gonna think these things and then show myself this example to remind me that my future self, she's not going to give a crap about any of us.
My future self would rather have me trying everything, rather than wasting one hot second, wondering if it's the right thing to do. She would rather have me actually waste my energy on getting a negative result, than wasting any energy trying to avoid getting a negative result. And she would definitely rather have me saying kind things that strengthen my self trust, instead of damaging it.
This is how we get to where we want to go. That is truly the secret. Pick your way, commit to it, and let it take as long as it takes. Just stop looking for all the reasons that it might not be the right way, and start showing yourself all the reasons why it's the perfect way to be doing it right now.
So here's what I want to leave you with. The only way that you're not going to have the business you want is if you quit. Otherwise, it's just a matter of time and energy.
You can speed yourself up by letting go of the things that hold you back. But even if you don't do that. Even if you take the longest, slowest, most painful way there, your future self is still gonna thank you. So stop worrying about doing it the right way and just get to work. I'm gonna do the same. Alright guys have a great week.
Hey, I know that running a small business can feel complicated. So let me help you uncomplicate it. I teach people how to harness their creative brainpower to take clear and focused action to accomplish their goals without burning out. I offer a free one hour consultation where we uncover what is really getting in your way right now.
And I'll show you step by step how to create an aligned business that you will love to build. In this conversation. I'm going to give you the foundation to work on confidently every single day, and it's going to be super simple. I want you to have the time and energy and freedom for everything that you want in life. And I want you to start having it right now. To find a time that works for you, visit linsibrownson.com